


Dreaming

by mewmewmewlin



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-03
Updated: 2012-12-03
Packaged: 2017-11-20 03:40:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/580919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mewmewmewlin/pseuds/mewmewmewlin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Would you let the inevitable stand in the way of something you've wanted for so long?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dreaming

Jade sat by the edge of the ship with her legs outstretched, leaning on her elbows. She was looking out into the void absentmindedly, watching the colors swirl by as the ship zoomed through the veil. She was taking in a moment to herself, enjoying the peace. Her dark hair swirled behind her, and she smiled and sighed as she tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear. She looked distant, but happy, thinking some fantastical thought that could only be thought up by one Jade Harley.

  
A figure stood behind her, far enough away that she couldn't sense his presence. Davesprite stood at the doorway leading to the bridge of the ship, watching Jade as she had her moment of uninterrupted peace. He didn't call for her attention or disturb her in anyway, he just wanted to watch and think and drink her in as much as possible. When she was at peace, so was he.

  
That's how it was for awhile. 1 year had already passed since they started their journey, Davesprite kept close check on the time. He couldn't help it, he was always counting the days, counting the days from when they left, and counting down the days until their arrival. He may not have been able to reach God Tier, but his role never changed. He was always the Knight of Time no matter what happened.

  
And the time he spent with Jade and John and the consorts was nothing short of wonderful. He got to laugh and joke around with the 2 people whom he never thought he would see again. Everyday on the ship was special, something to be celebrated, everyday something funny happened, or he had thought up a new rap or joke that would make Jade giggle. Even playing that rediculous game Egbert bought along with him, as much as Davesprite couldn't stand it, he knew Jade liked it just as much as he did. It gave him an excuse to make jokes about it with Jade, and playing that game became one of the things he looked forward to doing more than anything.

  
Suddenly 2 years didn't seem so long anymore.

  
Davesprite sighed. As much as his time with Jade and John made him happy, but also filled him with doubt and fear like nothing else quite could. It was an interesting feeling, these 2 warring emotions taking over his heart and mind, and not leaving room for anything else. He thought it trivial at first, trying to convince himself that he had more important, pressing issues to be thinking of, but no matter how hard he tried to convince himself his mind rounded around to those thoughts every time. The same thoughts that led him to the doorway of the bridge, watching one of his best friends like a fucking creeper. His feelings of friendship for John stayed the way they were, but as for Jade...  
Jade Harley was on his mind more than he could handle, and it was stressing him out.

  
She plagued his thoughts daily. He would be doing something as mundane as walking around the ship, and then he would think about something that happened the previous day that made her laugh. Suddenly he was thinking about that moment anymore, but just her. Her laugh and her smile and her cheerful demeanor all buzzing around his head until he couldn't breathe. Suddenly he was thinking about them together, just the two of them, maybe they were just hanging out, getting closer and closer until...Then he would catch himself, and feel embarrassed that he was having such thoughts about her.

  
He tried to combat these feelings, to remind himself that she couldn't be anymore than a friend to him, like John, but the more he fought it the more she would creep up in his mind. And he felt so, so wrong. He knew things about himself he didn't want to admit to the others, let alone himself. He knew something about himself that loomed over his head like a dark cloud, pissing reality all over any happy fantasy he had of him and Jade. The closer he got to her the more the thought stabbed and twisted at him until he couldn't take it anymore.

   
He was doomed, a copy fated to die. It was the rules, there was no avoiding it. He would certainly meet his end sometime soon. He didn't know how, or when, but it was certain, and he felt it with every passing day. With every happy moment, the thought would pound in the back of his head. With every laugh, it would choke him and make his laughter hollow. Every smile Jade flashed in his direction was like a knife in his heart. As happy as she made him, his feelings towards her set him into fits of melancholy. Sometimes he found himself having to slip away unnoticed from the rest to gather up his thoughts and come to terms with reality.

  
He was constantly at war with himself. A part of him wanted so badly to tell her, to speak up and let her know what his feelings were before he passed, maybe live out a but of fantasy before he had to do the unthinkable. Yet, could he really do that to her? Lay the wishes of the dying on her as his last breath? 'Hey Jade, I really like you, maybe we could have a date in a dream bubble sometime?' He didn't think so. He couldn't do that to her, feeding her information that would affect her after he passed, and might even damage her friendship with "Alpha Dave" once they all reunited.

  
Besides, did he even have the balls to spit it out? Was he really being courageous with his talk of suppressing his feelings for her, or was that just the excuse of a coward?  
So Davesprite resorted to staring at her from afar from doorways and looking at her forlornly when her back was turned like a lost puppy when he knew no one was watching. He didn't know what to do with himself; he made himself sick with all this sappy crap.

  
Jade stretched out with a yawn, her fluffy dog ears perking up as she stretched out her arms as wide as she could. Really, how could he not think of her when she was so damn cute? It was a cruel, but pleasurable pain, really. It gripped onto his heart so tight he thought it would burst and he though perhaps that's how he would die. His heart would explode into a million tiny pieces from the pressure. Perhaps if she were to end him that way, he might not mind dying so much. If he could die in her arms, finally telling her what's been buried inside of him for so long, he could go peacefully without any regrets. If he could just have this one thing that he wanted for so long...

  
Davesprite thought back, back to before the timelines split and he was still "Alpha Dave", when he was whole. Before the game started, back to when they had just started to become friends. Their friendship started slow, he remembered getting annoyed by her cheerful demeanor at first. He wanted to tell her off, that that cutesy act wasn’t going to fly with a cool, amazing specimen such as himself, but he found he couldn’t do it. She honestly thought he was cool just for being himself, not for the persona that he tried so desperately to become, and cherished him as a person. Jade was like that with each of them, himself, Rose, and John, and she tied their little group together with a ribbon of love and friendship.

  
As much as he tried to portray himself as aloof and disconnected from the world sometimes, Jade was there with an open mind and an open heart to show him that his act was just that – an act. He wasn’t aloof and distant at all. He wanted to be loved and accepted by his friends more than anything else. It just took him a little longer to realize, and she was there helping him along the way.

  
Then the game started, and he didn’t really think on it, having more pressing issues on his mind than goofing around with his feelings. But then John died, and he never heard from Jade again...

  
That’s when it hit him. The loss of his two best friends was an enormous blow, and in those 4 months in his timeline he fought every single day to find a way to figure out the tricks of the game so he could go back and make sure he could save them both. Rose was there at least, someone whom he cared about that could relate to the pain of losing two people very close to you, but he couldn’t fess up to the feeling of loneliness that came with losing Jade. Somehow putting it into words made it all the more real and Dave didn’t think he could handle anymore. He finally recognized his special feelings towards Jade and she was no longer around to hear him out. She wasn’t there to read the dozens of pages of notes he left her after she signed off for the night, wasn’t there to make anymore music with him, to hear his ramblings about school and home life and to make him smile.

  
He had a track saved on his computer, the last song they made together before they entered the medium. If that piece of music were a piece of fabric, like a beloved tee shirt or a favorite blanket, surely it would be riddled with holes from constant use.

  
After exhausting all their options, Dave couldn’t take it anymore, and after consulting with Rose he turned his tables, and jumped back. But the price for doing so was costly, taking what he was and transforming it into orange, feathery wings with information about the game that weighed on his mind. He watched his other self grab the prize of godhood, while his prize was the price of death.

  
But he had John and Jade all in one piece, and gods themselves no less, so it was justified in his mind. Just standing there watching Jade on the edge of the ship reminded him of what he really was fighting for.

  
Davesprite sighed, and he saw Jade’s white ears perk up. Uh oh, busted! He must have gotten so lost in thought he forgot about Jade’s acute senses.

  
“Davesprite!” She exclaimed, “What’s up?”

  
She was so unassuming, not thinking about just how long he had been standing there. Davesprite felt heat on his cheeks and tried to open his mouth to come up with something that would be a sufficient excuse to why he had been watching her like a creeper.

  
“Oh, uh, John...” he began, thinking fast, “I think he’s looking to round up players for another round of that ridiculous game...”

  
Jade laughed, “Figures. Just give me a minute?”

  
Davesprite was about to take his leave, but Jade caught his attention by patting her hand on the floor next to where she sat. She obviously wasn't ready for him to go.

  
Davesprite flew over to Jade, hovered over the spot she'd directed him to and lowered his body so he was eye level with her. He waved his tail casually, twisting and turning as he settled himself. After his inner monologue he wasn't quite ready to have a conversation with Jade of all people.

  
"What's new with you, coolkid? Any new material?"

  
Jade giggled again and Davesprite just shrugged. "Oh you know how it is. Can't get enough of my sicknasty jams can you?"

  
"Sooooooo coooool." She exploded into another fit of giggles. Davesprite just watched. He may have been watching her just a moment too long, because she met his gaze and stopped laughing.

  
"Is something wrong?" Jade asked, concern knitting her brows and Davesprite shook his head. He averted his gaze from her, and they both sat in silence for a moment.

Davesprite searched his mind for something to say. Being speechless was unnatural for him and he could sense Jade was starting to notice something was off about him.

Suddenly a thought crossed his mind, and he turned to face her.

  
"Hey Jade, do you have your computer?"

  
Jade was taken aback by his sudden inquiry and it took her a moment to register what he was asking.

  
"Uh, sure! Just gimmie a moment..." She extended her arm out in front of her, and in one sweeping, graceful motion pulled it back towards her chest as her computer materialized before her. Fiddling with the keyboard, she pulled up her desktop, and with a quick sweep of her fingers maximized the screen so it projected in front of the pair.

  
"Open up the music player," Davesprite instructed. "Do you still have that jam we made?"

  
Jade smiled wide. "Of course I do!" she exclaimed as she pulled up the program, fingers flying gracefully over the keyboard, "It's one of my favorites!"

  
"Really?" Davesprite questioned. She didn't reply, but a red flush tinted her cheeks as she scrolled through her song list. She found the tune, pressed play, and they listened.  
That song. Davesprite remembered it well, remembered him and Jade working painstakingly over it for days, pouring all their effort into making something special. Back during a time when things were easier and he didn't have to worry about doomed timelines and split bodies and the death of good friends. Back when he would get goosebumps from feelings he couldn't yet explain or understand. Feelings he didn't want to admit to himself, like now, but for simpler reasons.

  
The melody was calming and ambient, and even a bit romantic. There was a part of Jade, a part of herself whch she rarely made known and Davesprite only learned of by living in close quarters with her, that was actually a bit of a romantic sap. As he listened to the song again, he could finally hear the romantic undertones, and it was as if they were whispering to him a secret about Jade that he couldn't hear until now.

  
A new thought crossed his mind; could they have been put there on purpose?

  
Had she been trying to tell him something he was too clueless to pick up on?

  
Besides, this was in the past...it wasn't him she was feeling those feelings towards, if she felt them at all...

  
Well, it was, but it wasn't and...

  
Ah, what a mess.

  
Davesprite put his head in his hands.

  
The song ended, and Jade turned towards him, catching him with his head slumped.

  
"Davesprite, is something wrong?" Jade reached out and touched his hand, lowering it away from his face but not pulling away. Her hand lay upon his in a protective, comforting manner.

  
"I'm doomed, aren't I."

  
Silence. Neither of them spoke. Davesprite, out of embarassment for the word vomit that rolled off his toungue and Jade for a lack of a better word. He couldn't look at her. He opened his mind up and let spill out one of his uttermost worries and instantly regretted the act. Jade just started at his face, and although Davesprite wasn't looking at her he could sense her gaze. Was it concern? Was she pitying him? He felt the color rise in his cheeks again. _Fuck_.

  
What happened next knocked the air out of his lungs. Either from the fact that Jade launched herself at his chest, her arms encircling his torso tightly, or from the surprise at the realization that Jade had just launched herself at him. Probably both. She nuzzled her face into the feathers circling his neck, and her voice was low when she spoke through them.

  
"Don't talk like that."

  
Davesprite returned the embrace slowly, pulling her closer to him. She nuzzled into his downy neck again, gripping his back tightly as if he were going to float away any second, and he returned the gesture by pressing his lips to her hair, the fur on her fluffy white dog ears tickling his face. They stayed like that for awhile, silent, unmoving save for their steady breaths.

  
After a long while, Jade spoke up. Her voice held a tone of determination, it was strong and even a bit athoritative.

  
"We'll figure something out. I promise."

  
"Jade..." Davesprite whispered into her hair. Jade lifted herself off his chest and broke the embrace. Her face was set, stony, she wasn't backing down.

  
"Just, don't think on it."

  
Davesprite didn't say another word, he just looked at her incredulously. Was she really serious? His mind raced with something to fill in the silence, maybe a sarcastic qwip, something, anything to stop his heart from beating furiously. Jade turned her head suddenly, and Davesprite had to fight the urge to grab her and hold her until he believed with all his heart that something could be done.

  
"Play the song again?" Was all he was able to choke out. At least then maybe he could just enjoy the moment, play pretend for a little longer.

  
Jade complied wordlessly, pressing the replay button quickly to distract herself. The first few notes played. She put her hand down next to Davesprite's, and without thinking Davesprite put his hand upon hers.

  
For a quick moment Davesprite thought she would tear herself away, but instead of moving her hand she turned her head instead. She faced him and he noticed a pink tinge beneath her glassy, tear ridden eyes.

  
Seeing her eyes like that, that was his breaking point. He no longer thought, he no longer cared. His lips crushed hers before he even had time to tell himself to stop. He broke away quickly, and they locked eyes for a brief moment before Jade moved in to reciprocate.

  
His mind went blank. All that existed now were the petal soft lips that graced his own willingly. Honey sweet and warm, it filled his body with electricity from his head to his tail. Nothing existed except Jade. He threw his arms around her, pulling her closer, kissing her like it was his last dying wish. She gripped his feathery chest, matching his enthusiasim, holding on to him like he were going to vanish. When they separated, it was only to fall back into each other, pulled by the gravity of their need.

  
Jade pulled him down, her back flush against the floor of the ship and Davesprite extending over her, his wings fully extended. The colors that swirled around the ship bounced off his appendages, making his feathers a prism and bathing them in rainbow light. Jade broke off the kiss with a small peck and took in the sight of him. She smiled dreamily.

  
"It's like you're an angel." She whispered. "A dream."

  
Davesprite pressed his lips softly against her forhead.

  
"Dreams end, Harley."

  
"Not the ones that come true."

  
She kissed him again before he could retort. Davesprite sighed into her kiss. She wasn't making sense. None of this made sense. If it made sense she wouldn't be here, underneath him, in his arms, kissing his face, loving him.

  
It made him happy nothing made sense, if only for this moment.

  
The song ended long ago, but they stayed tangled up together on the edge of the ship. As Davesprite pressed his head against her chest she stroked his brightly colored hair, once again absentmindedly looking out into the void, and he perhaps got an inkling of an idea of what she might have been thinking about.

  
Perhaps, perhaps he could hold on to some hope. Maybe he could put some stock into what she said, what if dreams that come true stay real...?

  
But he knew deep down what was to come. He felt her chest rise and fall slowly as he closed his eyes. _Just a little while longer_ , he told himself. _Let this be real if only for a little while..._


End file.
